Epiphany
I’ve been debating how best to word this post since I was getting ready for work this morning. How do you communicate an item of positive self-discovery without tooting your own horn? I’ve resolved myself to just sharing because I’m excited, and you’ll just have to trust that I am not getting a big head about it. :)
The other day, I was running errands for work and I was listening to the radio. The DJ who works 11 to 7 was on and he was cracking me up. I’d always been the type of listener that just goes with the flow… tuning out the jabber between songs, changing stations when an ad came on, flipping from a song I didn’t care for… until I got this job.
Ever since I’ve been working for a production company, I practically turn up the volume when the commercials come on. I’m always listening to hear the ads I’ve written – making sure that the station’s broadcast level is good, signal is clear, and always checking the clock to see what time they aired it to make sure we’re getting the best possible exposure during our limited :30 seconds. It’s obsessive, I know. All of that to say this – This particular DJ, whose radio name is Tim Taylor and I met up several weeks ago when the station was doing a live remote during our ‘Be A Star – Win A Car’ auditions at the new dealership. We chit chatted and laughed and he turned out to be the nicest guy, and new to the area. Now when I have a chance to hear him during the day, I am always totally tuned in to hear what funny thing he’ll say. Basically, I can put a name to the voice now, and I am enjoying it.
So anyway, back to the other day… I’m listening to him and I decide, ‘What the heck? I’m just going to call and tell him he’s doing a great job.’ And I did… I waited for the commercials to end and a new song to start, and then I called. Once he put 2 and 2 together he was surprised I had called. And who wouldn’t be? How many times do you get a call at work just because someone thinks you’re funny? Okay, maybe you hilarious readers of mine have, but I haven’t… and apparently neither had he. He thanked me, but he basically just sat there dumbfounded. This is the point in the conversation where I gracefully (and by gracefully I mean, really awkwardly) said ‘Alright, well, good job, bye!’
It wasn’t one of those things that I immediately regretted, and I don’t really now either, it was just one of those WHY moments. Even this morning, I’m in the shower and I’m thinking – WHY did I do that? It wasn’t stupid of me, it was kind actually, but WHY? What came over me, and actually pushed me the point of dialing and calling a stranger? And then it hit me. This is the epiphany that the whole post is about. It’s just how I am, and it’s probably a hint at what I’m made for.
For those of you who are avid Amber-blog readers, you’ll remember a certain message I mentioned a couple of weeks ago. It was the one where a pastor I heard explained that a big part of finding God’s will for your life is looking at what you love, what you’re good at, what you enjoy doing, and then reasoning that there’s probably a really valid reason for it. Maybe it’s part of what you’re created to do. Now, I realize this thought process, and the way that I have written it is quite disjointed, but stay with me.
So I’m shampooing, I ask the WHY questions, and then a hundred pieces come flying together. Bam! Realization.
I’ve always done this. When I lived in Tulsa, I found the 40 year old mother who was estranged from her kids and invited her to Thanksgiving dinner. When the local NBC affiliate hired a young, new journalist out of Chicago and she didn’t know anyone, I invited her to hang out with my established group of friends. A client of ours contacted me recently about helping out with the 18 year old daughter of their German affiliate’s plant manager. She’ll be over here for a month visiting and he needs someone to take her under wing, and show her around. He called me. Now, I find out this DJ just moved here 3 months ago, doesn’t know anyone except people at the station, and I instinctively (and without much forethought; obviously) reach out to him.
This is the point where the whole “To post or not to post” quandary started. I realize that what I’ve typed could be construed as me patting myself on the back for loving the lonely or downtrodden, but that’s not the purpose. Writing is therapy. Putting things on paper can make something mentally disjointed come together. That’s what this is all about. This is me, growing.
Maybe all this ‘seeking others out’ is a reflection of something deeper. Something my life is meant to be… I’m awakening to this, and it’s thrilling to me. I think that God was speaking to me between rolling out of bed and getting dressed this morning. It’s just the beginning of some sort of wake up, but it’s grassroots direction for sure.
I know that connecting with the outsider and pulling them in is part of who God made me. I just never realized it, until today. I guess I know what it’s like to be friend-less because I’ve lived that before, and now I’m on a mission to make sure the people around me don’t feel like that.
I love when God gives us understanding and insight. And not just insight… direction for life.
The other day, I was running errands for work and I was listening to the radio. The DJ who works 11 to 7 was on and he was cracking me up. I’d always been the type of listener that just goes with the flow… tuning out the jabber between songs, changing stations when an ad came on, flipping from a song I didn’t care for… until I got this job.
Ever since I’ve been working for a production company, I practically turn up the volume when the commercials come on. I’m always listening to hear the ads I’ve written – making sure that the station’s broadcast level is good, signal is clear, and always checking the clock to see what time they aired it to make sure we’re getting the best possible exposure during our limited :30 seconds. It’s obsessive, I know. All of that to say this – This particular DJ, whose radio name is Tim Taylor and I met up several weeks ago when the station was doing a live remote during our ‘Be A Star – Win A Car’ auditions at the new dealership. We chit chatted and laughed and he turned out to be the nicest guy, and new to the area. Now when I have a chance to hear him during the day, I am always totally tuned in to hear what funny thing he’ll say. Basically, I can put a name to the voice now, and I am enjoying it.
So anyway, back to the other day… I’m listening to him and I decide, ‘What the heck? I’m just going to call and tell him he’s doing a great job.’ And I did… I waited for the commercials to end and a new song to start, and then I called. Once he put 2 and 2 together he was surprised I had called. And who wouldn’t be? How many times do you get a call at work just because someone thinks you’re funny? Okay, maybe you hilarious readers of mine have, but I haven’t… and apparently neither had he. He thanked me, but he basically just sat there dumbfounded. This is the point in the conversation where I gracefully (and by gracefully I mean, really awkwardly) said ‘Alright, well, good job, bye!’
It wasn’t one of those things that I immediately regretted, and I don’t really now either, it was just one of those WHY moments. Even this morning, I’m in the shower and I’m thinking – WHY did I do that? It wasn’t stupid of me, it was kind actually, but WHY? What came over me, and actually pushed me the point of dialing and calling a stranger? And then it hit me. This is the epiphany that the whole post is about. It’s just how I am, and it’s probably a hint at what I’m made for.
For those of you who are avid Amber-blog readers, you’ll remember a certain message I mentioned a couple of weeks ago. It was the one where a pastor I heard explained that a big part of finding God’s will for your life is looking at what you love, what you’re good at, what you enjoy doing, and then reasoning that there’s probably a really valid reason for it. Maybe it’s part of what you’re created to do. Now, I realize this thought process, and the way that I have written it is quite disjointed, but stay with me.
So I’m shampooing, I ask the WHY questions, and then a hundred pieces come flying together. Bam! Realization.
I’ve always done this. When I lived in Tulsa, I found the 40 year old mother who was estranged from her kids and invited her to Thanksgiving dinner. When the local NBC affiliate hired a young, new journalist out of Chicago and she didn’t know anyone, I invited her to hang out with my established group of friends. A client of ours contacted me recently about helping out with the 18 year old daughter of their German affiliate’s plant manager. She’ll be over here for a month visiting and he needs someone to take her under wing, and show her around. He called me. Now, I find out this DJ just moved here 3 months ago, doesn’t know anyone except people at the station, and I instinctively (and without much forethought; obviously) reach out to him.
This is the point where the whole “To post or not to post” quandary started. I realize that what I’ve typed could be construed as me patting myself on the back for loving the lonely or downtrodden, but that’s not the purpose. Writing is therapy. Putting things on paper can make something mentally disjointed come together. That’s what this is all about. This is me, growing.
Maybe all this ‘seeking others out’ is a reflection of something deeper. Something my life is meant to be… I’m awakening to this, and it’s thrilling to me. I think that God was speaking to me between rolling out of bed and getting dressed this morning. It’s just the beginning of some sort of wake up, but it’s grassroots direction for sure.
I know that connecting with the outsider and pulling them in is part of who God made me. I just never realized it, until today. I guess I know what it’s like to be friend-less because I’ve lived that before, and now I’m on a mission to make sure the people around me don’t feel like that.
I love when God gives us understanding and insight. And not just insight… direction for life.
posted by Amber | 12:12 PM
1 Comments:
That's how you found me, too... remember? Just you reaching out to some weird kid in a tent. That is you, and this post is you growing.
I think that it's great you're writing, great you're learning every day, and I for one am just thankful to be able to see all the steps you're taking.
Good job, Amber.
This may sound kinda dumb, but I have never been more proud of you... for realizing something almost everyone has always been able to see in you.
You've come a long way, but baby, you've got even further to go. You know you can do it.
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